1436.2000-06-21.farmer.ham.txt 2.6 KB

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  1. Subject: reliant ' s attempt at humor
  2. look what our competition thinks about us .
  3. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - forwarded by steve venturatos / hou / ect on 06 / 21 / 2000
  4. 03 : 02 pm - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
  5. angie zeman @ enron
  6. 06 / 21 / 2000 02 : 18 pm
  7. to : steve venturatos / hou / ect @ ect
  8. cc :
  9. subject : reliant ' s attempt at humor
  10. -
  11. thought you might like to see ( and get a laugh at ) what ; s going around !
  12. - -
  13. thought you would find the below " press release " a bit
  14. humorous . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . everyone is always looking to bash
  15. # 1 . . . . . . . . . . . and from the looks of the cc ' s , it has made a good loop around
  16. at both reliant and the diner .
  17. for immediate release
  18. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
  19. today enron and hades announced a definitive energy services agreement said
  20. to be worth an estimated $ 666 trillion .
  21. in the deal , enron will provide both gas and electric commodities to hades '
  22. facilities throughout and under north america . john d . rockefeller , former
  23. ceo of energy monopolist standard oil , is now head of hades ' energy
  24. management division . said rockefeller , " obviously hell has significant
  25. heating demands . while eternal flames are a great idea in concept , they
  26. require vast and reliable fuel resources . enron was the only supplier
  27. willing to make a deal with my boss , and , as a former monopolist , i just
  28. like the way they do business . "
  29. a spokesperson for enron said the two cultures were able to work easily
  30. together during negotiations . according to the company , " the deal fits both
  31. companies exceptionally well . with hades ' ability to attract and retain new
  32. customers , we see this as a fabulous growth opportunity for millennia to
  33. come . " according to several energy industry insiders , hades ' high heating
  34. demand with very little need for summer air conditioning make it a very
  35. attractive energy portfolio addition .
  36. hades is a multinational corporation with millions of sites worldwide and
  37. approximately 173 quintillion customers . the entity boasts sustained high
  38. growth rates over the last two thousand years .
  39. enron is one of the world ' s leading energy and communications companies .
  40. the company owns approximately $ 37 billion in energy and communications
  41. assets . enron ranks in the top quarter of fortune ' s " best 100 companies to
  42. work for if you can keep a job there and don ' t mind working 80 hours a
  43. week , " and is among the most respected corporations in america , as ranked by
  44. customers with respect - us - or - get - curtailed clauses in their energy supply
  45. contracts .